Namaste

I have been practicing yoga consistently for two weeks now. I have been able to intentionally set a routine and stick to it. I go through my practice every morning before getting ready for work, and it helps me to concentrate on my focus and intention for that day. Some days, I end my day with a bedtime yoga practice. Ending my day with relieving my stress, stretching my muscles and calming my mind help me to have a much more restful night's sleep.

I have found that Yoga With Adriene has the best series of videos for me. She is very easy to follow and allows you the freedom to not only find what feels good by making the practice work for you and your ability, but she also encourages you to acknowledge thoughts that come to you as you go through your practice, instead of asking you to push the thoughts completely out of your mind.

My journey in the past two weeks has been amazing, and I have seen the benefits of it daily. In no particular order, I want to acknowledge and talk about these benefits.

More energy (prana): when I begin my day by waking up my muscles, I also am able to awake something in my brain. The body is an amazing thing. When you spend any amount of time on self care, you can feel the recharge and refuel from brain to toes.

Better sleep: I don't sleep much, and in general I don't sleep very soundly, but when I do yoga before bed, and allow myself to acknowledge, tackle, and in the end unwind my day, I am able to sleep better than I ever have. It relaxes me so well that some nights I can't even make it through the whole sequence without almost falling asleep.

Closer to God: I use my yoga time not only to improve my flexibility, acknowledge my day, or set my intention for the day, but also to connect with God by trusting Him to show me what my body is capable of. I use the time to praise Him for all He does for me daily and bring everything to Him while on my mat.

Better range of motion: every day, the practice gets easier for me. This shows me my improved flexibility and range of motion, but after only a week, my trainer also noticed a difference! Just a week! I love it.

More self-esteem and confidence: I find my confidence growing daily because I am allowing myself to spend time on self care and self love. This is something I am not usually very good at, so just 30 minutes a day has made a world of a difference.

Improved workouts: running is hard. Running is still hard, no matter how much I do yoga. But my stamina is better, my legs don't hurt as much, and I am feeling confident that I will be able to do that half marathon this summer. Yoga has also made me stronger, allowing me to push harder and challenge myself more in my weight training.

Less stress: I don't have less stressful events in my daily life, but I am able to deal with the stress in a more positive and effective way. Instead of my mind going to all the bad places when something comes up, I take it to Jesus, practice my breathing and allow myself to acknowledge my feelings in a healthy way.

I'm sure I could go on all day about how much yoga has improved my life these past two weeks. But I also want to acknowledge that yoga doesn't have to be perfect. It is about you finding your ability, meeting your body where it's at, and improving yourself on a daily basis. Some people do not have the ability to create most poses in yoga practice, and that's ok. Stretching (whether it's basic stretches for every day, yoga, pilates, chair yoga, bed yoga, or even just the awareness of breath) has the same benefits I have experienced in my practice. Pure Home and Body outlined 10 benefits of stretching as well: more flexibility, ability to manage stress, clearer thinking, pain management, improved body awareness, better sleep, injury prevention, happier, weight loss and improved balance and posture.

No matter what your ability is, I challenge you to join me. Find awareness with your body and practice some self love. Namaste.

Let Go Of Fear. Embrace Change.

Some things never change. My brother loves cars. I remember playing various renditions of the "car game" on road trips growing up with him. We would take turns choosing our cars, and the one with the best or the most cars in the end would win. He would always win. I chose the cars based on their color or even their functionality (as I was thinking about pretending to have a family to drive around in these cars). He chose the cars based on their value, horsepower, body style, etc. Car stuff. Now he has his own little collection of big and model cars, and I have one. He will always win the car game.

I have a couple people who I consider my very best friends. My cousin Stefani and I were best friends since the beginning, and we are each still one of the first people called if we need someone to talk to. Here's the thing about best friends. We don't sugar coat the truth or hesitate to call out wrongs. We don't pretend that everything is ok when everjything is falling apart. In fact, best friends can tell when everything is falling apart. There is no filter, and there are no masks or pretending to be someone else. Hannah and I became friends in middle school. We both played the flute, were both academically focused and we had some friends that ended up coming together to create our group. No matter what happens, Hannah is always one of my first phone calls if I need someone to talk to. We don't talk nearly as often as I would like, but I know she is always there, even if we are a four and a half hour drive apart. She still holds me up when I'm down, just like she held my dress up at prom. I kind of forced Cori to be my friend during our freshman year at Corban. I only knew one family at the time I moved to Salem, so I was determined to make a lot of new friends. Evidently so determined that I turned around during our first class together and asked her if she wanted to have a movie night with some of my other new friends. Though she didn't come to that first opportunity to hang out, we still became friends, and over the last eight years have become best friends. The thing that stays the same, with each of my best friends, is our heart. We can be walking different paths. We can have different things going on in our lives. But the one thing that remains the same, the one thing that never changes, is the fact that distance doesn't separate us or change our friendship. We are transparent with each other and we know that through everything, we are there for each other.

See, some things never change. And it's a good thing. I wouldn't trade any of those girls for the world. Some things do change though. And it's a good thing as well. I've lost some weight over the last few years. I've gained some of it back, but the majority of what I have lost, I lost for good. Throughout my journey to optimal health, I have a new found love and appreciation for exercise. It's not that I was sedentary before I lost my weight, but I didn't love it. I didn't appreciate the way a human body could change and transform. I had never experienced that sort of transformation. I always said I wasn't a runner. In 8th grade volleyball, we had to run from the middle school gym, around the high school tennis courts and back. In total, it may have been one quarter of a mile. But the one time I decided to give everything I had, and not come in last place, I ran smack into a handicapped sign, dented it, and got a bruise that looked like a teddy bear. Running was bad. I hated running, mostly because I was never in shape enough to run. My freshman year of high school, I chose swimming over volleyball, even though I loved volleyball, because I didn't want to be cut from the volleyball team for not being able to run fast enough. The varsity requirement was an eight-minute mile. That was intimidating to me because I don't think I could even run a complete mile without stopping to walk. I haven't ran an eight-minute mile yet, but I'll get there. Because I'm committed to changing my body and my lifestyle. 

Society and technology change too. And it's sure a good thing. Without technological changes, I wouldn't have met my boyfriend, and probably would have had a much harder time dating him for a year when we are 1,969.6 miles apart. I wouldn't be able to share my heart through this blog, or call my parents to just say hi. Without societal changes, I never would have been able to even date my boyfriend because he's black. I wouldn't have even been able to walk into the same restaurant or use the same water fountain as him. Change is good. For the most part, I would say that I welcome change. However, change also brings about controversy and conflict. Dred Scott > Civil War > Prohibition > Women's Suffrage > Gun Control > Gay Marriage > Marijuana Legalization > Syrian Refugees > Transgender Rights.

For some reason we are fearful of change. We are fearful of change as a nation, and we are fearful of change as individuals. I'm not going to go into my thoughts on each of the recent issues. Honestly, it doesn't matter for the purpose and point I'm trying to make. What matters is that change can absolutely not be feared. When these big issues come up, we can look into them logically, pray about them Biblically, explore them and form our own opinions, but we cannot for one moment let fear drive our lives. By living in fear, we are not living our lives to the fullest. We are choosing to swim instead of play volleyball because we are afraid to run.

I honestly can't stop thinking about and praying for the Pulse nightclub shooting. Initially, officials refused to recognize that the crime committed was an act of terror. I think they were afraid to say the word ISIS and admit that there are Islamic terrorists among us. They let fear drive their decision to withhold the fact that Omar Mateen declared allegiance to the Islamic State on a phone call with 911 during the attack. They let fear drive their decision to let people believe that this is a gun problem. They let fear drive their decision to let people believe that all Muslims are bad. We need to stop living in fear. A few days ago I saw an article that brought joy to my soul. The owner of Pulse seems to have committed to reopen the nightclub. I'm not saying that bars are good places to hang out, or that everyone needs to fly out to Orlando for the grand opening, but I'm proud. I'm proud that the owner is not letting fear ruin their lives. I'm proud that, despite the expected backlash and criticism, fear is not going to get in the way of honoring the victims and their families. Fear is not going to mask the fact that 49 people lost their lives and 53 people were injured. This world needs more love. This world needs Jesus.

When bad things happen, we tend to let fear dictate. We tend to stop our lives and live cautiously. God calls us to bigger and better things. He calls us to live life loud. We are called to let go of fear and allow God to drive our lives. We are called to love and to be loved by Him. Perfect love drives out fear. Over and over again, God tells His people to not fear because He is with them. He is still with us. This still applies. Isaiah 41:10 says, "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." He will strengthen us, He will lift us up on wings like eagles, He will uphold us with His righteous hand. Most importantly, He will be with us every single step of the way. We also aren't supposed to stay the same. We are supposed to grow closer to Him, and look more like Him every day. We are called to allow Him to transform our lives and move in our lives. When we have just the tiniest bit of faith in Him, we can move mountains, and bring the kind of change that this world desperately needs.

I've come a long way since my freshman year of high school. I'm more mature. I look a lot better. I don't let the fear of not fitting in stop me from doing things. I don't hate running anymore. I am actually starting to really enjoy it (I might even love it). I ran a 5K last weekend. I completed it in 36:03. That's not quite an eight-minute mile, but I ran the whole time (minus the couple times I thought I might hurl). Change might not be easy, but I welcome it. A lot of the times, change is good, and it's worth it. Embrace the friendships and relationships that don't change despite time and distance. And welcome the inevitable changes that come when we allow God to take our fears from us, and transform us into the person He wants us to become.

My God is bigger than my fears.