I'm really excited that my best friend agreed to join me on this one as a guest blogger. I kind of love her and you should too! Check her blog out at: Life In The Coffee Lane. (Also, yes, we definitely sent out Best-Friend Christmas cards. It's a new thing.)
10 Accomplishments (Alisa)
1. Speaking out for the things I’m passionate about
I’ve learned that it’s ok to not be silent about what I believe. I’m going to continue to speak out against the things that make my blood boil.
2. Doing things for me
I’ve done a better job of giving myself priority, of saying no to things I don’t need to do, and of choosing to get out there and do things for myself.
3. Beaver season tickets
Honestly my favorite purchase of 2016 – I can’t wait for next year!
4. Evaluating myself and my views about the world
This evaluation has been enlightening. I’ve finally come to realize where I stand politically, and have a new fire in my heart to speak out and stand up for humanity.
5. Graduating to preschool
This is far less stinky. Much fewer poopy diapers.
6. New family members
Not necessarily my accomplishment – but still fun to welcome Travis and Kaisha in to our crazy family. And also baby Skarlett. She just has no choice but to be a part of our family.
7. Hiring a personal trainer
Second best purchase of 2016 – I can’t wait to see the changes that happen this year!
8. Really thinking about and trying to live Jesus’ love for the world
Again – back to fighting for humanity – my goal is to love the way Jesus loves and to stick up for those who don’t have anyone to stick up for them.
9. Voting – even though I didn’t want to
Seriously a huge accomplishment. It took me two days, and I had to watch White Christmas to even get through my ballot.
10. Trusting God when I didn’t want to listen
This was the hardest accomplishment. That still, small voice inside. That’s a real thing. And worth it every time to listen to Him.
11. Rereading the Harry Potter series. Again. My yearly tradition (bonus)
Yes. Just so much yes.
10 Highlights (accomplishments, best memories) (Cori)
1. Moving to the west side in my own apartment
2. Being offered a leadership opportunity at work
3. Given more responsibility and trust at work
4. Rebuilding a relationship with cousins I had but on the back burner
5. Being a part of Norah’s life
6. Watching Miranda and Jordan become amazing parents to a beautiful baby girl
7. Finally understanding the importance of quality friends over quantity of friends
8. Gaining more confidence in myself and coming to terms that I like who I am and what I am doing with my life
9. Stepping outside of my comfort zone and making new friends
10. Having accomplished my goal of reading 75 books this year (nerd alert!)
10 Disappointments (Alisa)
Disclaimer: A lot of these disappointments are about my relationship with Marcus. I don't want you to think that he's not a good guy. He is. He's just not good for me.
1. Staying in an unhealthy relationship for so long, even though I knew it was unhealthy
Mostly I’m disappointed in myself because I could recognize that the relationship was unhealthy, but wouldn’t let myself get out of it earlier.
2. Losing sight of my joy
This also has to do with that unhealthy relationship. I wanted the future so badly that I let my joy dissipate little by little.
3. Letting others dictate my happiness and self-worth
See above – this relationship thing had a huge impact.
4. Losing focus on my time with Jesus
Again, see above.
5. Unwanted weight
I tried so hard for so long because Marcus wanted me to exercise a certain way that I gained some weight back once we broke up. That will change.
6. Letting someone else tell me how to feel my emotions
This was probably the biggest realization, and by far the biggest reason I broke up with Marcus. I was being told how to feel and experience my emotions. I was being told I couldn’t cry, because he didn’t want a “weak wife” one day. I started to try and change who I was and how I felt things, and I couldn’t be more grateful that I put a stop to that before it got worse.
7. Not watching the Sound of Music enough
I don’t know that I even watched it once in 2016. That may happen tonight.
8. Not going to Disneyland
It’s been 11 years. That’s WAY too long.
9. Not getting my acceptance letter to Hogwarts
This may sound like a joke to you, but it’s real. I’m still waiting. It’s just been held up in the Owlery for the past 15 years.
10. Not going skiing
I really would LOVE to ski again. Anyone want to plan a trip with me?
10 Disappointments (failures, missed opportunities) (Cori)
1. Applying and not getting into a doctorate program I was excited for
2. Saying goodbye to a cousin I loved dearly
3. Losing a friendship that had meant the world to me
4. Revealing I liked a person and not having that returned
5. Trying online dating and having two dates that did not turn out well
6. Saying goodbye to a supervisor that I cherished
7. Letting my stubbornness drive away a person I cared for
8. Being prejudice towards a new supervisor
9. Letting someone tell me I was not good enough and believing it
10. Using anger to fuel my need for acceptance
3 Game Changers (Alisa)
1. Marcus – relationship and breakup
I learned a lot. I loved hard. I changed too much. 2017 will be about finding myself again and learning how to love again in a healthy way.
2. The wedding
Not only did I gain a brother and a niece, I had a huge, impactful conversation with my dad that made me think about my relationship with Marcus (without him even knowing half of what the relationship looked like).
3. Humanity
It’s been a tough year for humanity – but it’s been a blessing to me to realize the impact I want to have for people.
3 Game Changers (unexpected events that shifted your priorities) (Cori)
1. A best friend finding someone else to rely on
2. A new opportunity at work that could boost my status in the field
3. Finding my God-given mission to help change myself
3 Things You Focused On (Alisa)
1. Relationships
Good and bad – I focused A LOT of attention on relationships.
2. The future
Marcus and I talked a lot about the future. We made plans. They didn’t happen. Once we broke up, I had to reevaluate that future. That’s about where I’m at going in to 2017.
3. Other people and their opinions
This was huge. Too huge for me. I need to remember that what other people think does not matter. All that matters is what God thinks and who He created me to be.
3 Things you Focused on (what you put most of your time into) (Cori)
1. Who I am
2. Being the best child and family therapist I can be
3. How to be more open and sharing what I am truly feeling, instead of hiding it and pretending I am okay
3 Things You Forgot (Alisa)
1. I forgot to rely on prayer as much as I should
I’ve started to change this again. I know my God is a God who hears and answers.
2. God made me to experience emotion the way I do on PURPOSE and for a purpose.
I’m a feeler. That’s how He made me and that’s how I’ll stay.
3. I don’t need to change for anyone.
Will I grow? Absolutely. I don’t want to be stagnant in my relationship with God. But I’m not going to change to get acceptance from anyone.
3 Things You Forgot (what you didn’t get around to) (Cori)
1. Saying sorry (help me out JB!)
2. To say goodbye
3. Trusting myself
Reflection (Alisa)
2016 was a year of lessons for me. It was a year to learn who I am, what I believe and to relearn the things I should be focusing on. I am thankful that I have grown through every thing that has happened this year, and especially thankful that God uses our pain to bring His peace and joy. I look forward to 2017 and a year of more growth, more opportunity and more change. Bring it on!
Reflection (how does this inform your plans for next year?) (Cori)
- For this next year I plan on applying to a different doctoral program with more confidence and understanding in what I am aiming for.
- Being able to be myself and not change to please others
- Feeling confident in the woman that God has made me and not hide that
- Knowing that people can change and that it is okay to talk about the pain it may cause
- Reminding myself that each day is a new adventure and that I have a support system that will love me and care for me every step of the way.
Expectation: I'm going to live with expectation. The expectation that my God answers prayers. The expectation that I can and will accomplish my goals and dreams. The expectation that I can get through trials and hurdles because I don't live by my own strength. The expectation that 2017 will be better than 2016.
Adventure: I sure love adventure. I am looking forward to living an adventurous 2017. I don't know what that will look like exactly yet, but I'm guessing there will be more hikes, more spontaneous trips, and more meeting new people. Adventure is out there! Embrace and love the journey.
Purpose: I am going to live my life on purpose, while pursuing the purpose God has for my life. I'm going to purposely seek out those who need love. I'm going to stand up for those who need standing up for. I'm going to purpose to be a better friend, daughter, granddaughter, sister and aunt. I'm going to live lifrom with purpose and with passion. I'm going to love with passion. I'm puprosely going to be active: physically, spiritually, mentally and in the way I stick to and live out the things I believe and am passionate about.
10 Accomplishments (Alisa)
1. Speaking out for the things I’m passionate about
I’ve learned that it’s ok to not be silent about what I believe. I’m going to continue to speak out against the things that make my blood boil.
2. Doing things for me
I’ve done a better job of giving myself priority, of saying no to things I don’t need to do, and of choosing to get out there and do things for myself.
3. Beaver season tickets
Honestly my favorite purchase of 2016 – I can’t wait for next year!
4. Evaluating myself and my views about the world
This evaluation has been enlightening. I’ve finally come to realize where I stand politically, and have a new fire in my heart to speak out and stand up for humanity.
5. Graduating to preschool
This is far less stinky. Much fewer poopy diapers.
6. New family members
Not necessarily my accomplishment – but still fun to welcome Travis and Kaisha in to our crazy family. And also baby Skarlett. She just has no choice but to be a part of our family.
7. Hiring a personal trainer
Second best purchase of 2016 – I can’t wait to see the changes that happen this year!
8. Really thinking about and trying to live Jesus’ love for the world
Again – back to fighting for humanity – my goal is to love the way Jesus loves and to stick up for those who don’t have anyone to stick up for them.
9. Voting – even though I didn’t want to
Seriously a huge accomplishment. It took me two days, and I had to watch White Christmas to even get through my ballot.
10. Trusting God when I didn’t want to listen
This was the hardest accomplishment. That still, small voice inside. That’s a real thing. And worth it every time to listen to Him.
11. Rereading the Harry Potter series. Again. My yearly tradition (bonus)
Yes. Just so much yes.
10 Highlights (accomplishments, best memories) (Cori)
1. Moving to the west side in my own apartment
2. Being offered a leadership opportunity at work
3. Given more responsibility and trust at work
4. Rebuilding a relationship with cousins I had but on the back burner
5. Being a part of Norah’s life
6. Watching Miranda and Jordan become amazing parents to a beautiful baby girl
7. Finally understanding the importance of quality friends over quantity of friends
8. Gaining more confidence in myself and coming to terms that I like who I am and what I am doing with my life
9. Stepping outside of my comfort zone and making new friends
10. Having accomplished my goal of reading 75 books this year (nerd alert!)
10 Disappointments (Alisa)
1. Staying in an unhealthy relationship for so long, even though I knew it was unhealthy
Mostly I’m disappointed in myself because I could recognize that the relationship was unhealthy, but wouldn’t let myself get out of it earlier.
2. Losing sight of my joy
This also has to do with that unhealthy relationship. I wanted the future so badly that I let my joy dissipate little by little.
3. Letting others dictate my happiness and self-worth
See above – this relationship thing had a huge impact.
4. Losing focus on my time with Jesus
Again, see above.
5. Unwanted weight
I tried so hard for so long because Marcus wanted me to exercise a certain way that I gained some weight back once we broke up. That will change.
6. Letting someone else tell me how to feel my emotions
This was probably the biggest realization, and by far the biggest reason I broke up with Marcus. I was being told how to feel and experience my emotions. I was being told I couldn’t cry, because he didn’t want a “weak wife” one day. I started to try and change who I was and how I felt things, and I couldn’t be more grateful that I put a stop to that before it got worse.
7. Not watching the Sound of Music enough
I don’t know that I even watched it once in 2016. That may happen tonight.
8. Not going to Disneyland
It’s been 11 years. That’s WAY too long.
9. Not getting my acceptance letter to Hogwarts
This may sound like a joke to you, but it’s real. I’m still waiting. It’s just been held up in the Owlery for the past 15 years.
10. Not going skiing
I really would LOVE to ski again. Anyone want to plan a trip with me?
10 Disappointments (failures, missed opportunities) (Cori)
1. Applying and not getting into a doctorate program I was excited for
2. Saying goodbye to a cousin I loved dearly
3. Losing a friendship that had meant the world to me
4. Revealing I liked a person and not having that returned
5. Trying online dating and having two dates that did not turn out well
6. Saying goodbye to a supervisor that I cherished
7. Letting my stubbornness drive away a person I cared for
8. Being prejudice towards a new supervisor
9. Letting someone tell me I was not good enough and believing it
10. Using anger to fuel my need for acceptance
3 Game Changers (Alisa)
1. Marcus – relationship and breakup
I learned a lot. I loved hard. I changed too much. 2017 will be about finding myself again and learning how to love again in a healthy way.
2. The wedding
Not only did I gain a brother and a niece, I had a huge, impactful conversation with my dad that made me think about my relationship with Marcus (without him even knowing half of what the relationship looked like).
3. Humanity
It’s been a tough year for humanity – but it’s been a blessing to me to realize the impact I want to have for people.
3 Game Changers (unexpected events that shifted your priorities) (Cori)
1. A best friend finding someone else to rely on
2. A new opportunity at work that could boost my status in the field
3. Finding my God-given mission to help change myself
3 Things You Focused On (Alisa)
1. Relationships
Good and bad – I focused A LOT of attention on relationships.
2. The future
Marcus and I talked a lot about the future. We made plans. They didn’t happen. Once we broke up, I had to reevaluate that future. That’s about where I’m at going in to 2017.
3. Other people and their opinions
This was huge. Too huge for me. I need to remember that what other people think does not matter. All that matters is what God thinks and who He created me to be.
3 Things you Focused on (what you put most of your time into) (Cori)
1. Who I am
2. Being the best child and family therapist I can be
3. How to be more open and sharing what I am truly feeling, instead of hiding it and pretending I am okay
3 Things You Forgot (Alisa)
1. I forgot to rely on prayer as much as I should
I’ve started to change this again. I know my God is a God who hears and answers.
2. God made me to experience emotion the way I do on PURPOSE and for a purpose.
I’m a feeler. That’s how He made me and that’s how I’ll stay.
3. I don’t need to change for anyone.
Will I grow? Absolutely. I don’t want to be stagnant in my relationship with God. But I’m not going to change to get acceptance from anyone.
3 Things You Forgot (what you didn’t get around to) (Cori)
1. Saying sorry (help me out JB!)
2. To say goodbye
3. Trusting myself
Reflection (Alisa)
2016 was a year of lessons for me. It was a year to learn who I am, what I believe and to relearn the things I should be focusing on. I am thankful that I have grown through every thing that has happened this year, and especially thankful that God uses our pain to bring His peace and joy. I look forward to 2017 and a year of more growth, more opportunity and more change. Bring it on!
Reflection (how does this inform your plans for next year?) (Cori)
- For this next year I plan on applying to a different doctoral program with more confidence and understanding in what I am aiming for.
- Being able to be myself and not change to please others
- Feeling confident in the woman that God has made me and not hide that
- Knowing that people can change and that it is okay to talk about the pain it may cause
- Reminding myself that each day is a new adventure and that I have a support system that will love me and care for me every step of the way.
I decided I'm going to LEAP into 2017 this year. Leap is going to be my theme word. And because I'm me, leap is of course an acronym, and for all intents and purposes, LEAP is my New Year resolution.
Love
Expectation
Adventure
Purpose
Expectation
Adventure
Purpose
Love: First of all, I'm going to focus on loving God more than ever. I need to spend more time studying the Word, praying and focus my heart on Him every day. From that love for Him, I'm going to love myself more. I'm going to take time to do things I love. I'm going to look into options for my future, and I'm going to focus on the way I talk to myself about myself. By loving God more and loving myself more, I will be able to love people more fiercely and more boldly than ever. 2017 is going to be a year of bold, crazy, intense love.
Expectation: I'm going to live with expectation. The expectation that my God answers prayers. The expectation that I can and will accomplish my goals and dreams. The expectation that I can get through trials and hurdles because I don't live by my own strength. The expectation that 2017 will be better than 2016.
Adventure: I sure love adventure. I am looking forward to living an adventurous 2017. I don't know what that will look like exactly yet, but I'm guessing there will be more hikes, more spontaneous trips, and more meeting new people. Adventure is out there! Embrace and love the journey.
Purpose: I am going to live my life on purpose, while pursuing the purpose God has for my life. I'm going to purposely seek out those who need love. I'm going to stand up for those who need standing up for. I'm going to purpose to be a better friend, daughter, granddaughter, sister and aunt. I'm going to live lifrom with purpose and with passion. I'm going to love with passion. I'm puprosely going to be active: physically, spiritually, mentally and in the way I stick to and live out the things I believe and am passionate about.
So here we go, 2017, I'm leaping for you!
As always, love fiercely and love boldly.
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